The first time John had a ‘sensual massage’ - the type where you pay extra for a happy ending - was after a breakup. 

But it wasn’t until he started dating a girl who was a sex worker that he thought about being a masseur himself. 

“Once I looked into it I quickly realised sex industry customers are mainly dominated by men. So if I chose to just service women I would barely get any money. 

“But if I chose to do men as well, it would be much easier to make more.”

John, who wanted to remain anonymous in this story for privacy reasons, says he is straight in his personal life and had never been with a guy before he started doing what he calls “gay for pay” sex work.

“After my first time trying it, I felt fine. A different persona takes over me,” he laughs.

“At the end of the day they’re paying for a service, so I’m just capitalising on that.”

Re: News journalist Zoe Madden-Smith sat down with John to hear more about what it’s like being a male sex worker.

What was the hiring process like at the massage parlour, did you have to do training of any sort?

Once I started looking I realised most of the sensual massage places are generally always hiring so I just sent an email and we had a phone call and then the next day I was giving happy-ending massages.

There was training offered where they discount the massage for a customer and you have the trainer there with you in the room. But I didn’t take it up, I just went for it.

What are the most popular requests you get?

It’s very case by case but generally speaking, the most popular extras are blowjobs which are of course covered [with a condom], and body slides. 

How would you describe a body slide?

You are basically a slug on their body. There are different combinations, so they could be lying on their front or facing upwards and I’m sliding along their body using a lot of oil.

What was it like giving your first blow job?

It was pretty funny. I could take it deeper than I expected so that was pretty cool.

One thought I had afterwards was that I appreciate my girl a lot more now. 

Do you have any rules for your clients?

My personal rules are no kissing and no sexual acts on me. I've had people ask if they want to suck me off, but I don’t want that so that’s out of bounds. Same with penetrative sex, but that being said - everything has a price. 

A lot of the clients just want you to be intimate with them, so looking into their eyes and being close to them. 

Do people ask to cuddle you?

Yeah sometimes, but it’s pretty uncomfortable for me to pretend to be intimate. I don’t like that shit, even with girls I am seeing. 

How much do you make from this side hustle?

So how it works is you give in your roster saying you want to work these days. For women, it’s a bit unfortunate because they have to stay on-site so they are available for their allotted hours. If no one shows up, then they don’t get paid.

But for guys, it is an on-call situation. If someone is interested during my allotted hours I will just pop in.

I get $100 as a base rate, but I always try and hustle for extras so it would average about $300 dollars an hour and I’ll do maybe one or two massages a week. 

But there are a lot of weeks where I don’t get any at all. I’ll get paid about $800 after tax for my normal job, so getting that influx makes a difference. 

What is the demographic of your clients?

All sorts but there are a lot of Asian clients. I guess the age range would be mainly 35 plus. I’ve only ever had one female client.

Who in your life knows that you do sex work?

I’ve probably told at least 10 people who are my friends and none of them had a bad reaction, they’ve all been really supportive. We just crack jokes about it and talk shit about it, it’s been pretty funny actually.

Do you tell people you are dating you are a sex worker?

In my two most recent dating experiences, if I feel comfortable telling them, I’ll see them another time. But if I don't feel comfortable enough to tell them, I just won't see them.

Have you ever felt unsafe doing sex work?

I do think being a male sex worker is probably be easier. For example, for women, it’s expected they will be nude but for guys, we can get paid extra just for taking our undies off. It’s generally $50 bucks just to take your undies off.

There’s also a different power imbalance. I’ve been told guys will try and push the boundaries a lot more with women. But because I am physically equal to them, I’ve never had anything bad happen. For the most part, everyone is very respectful. 

The place I work at is really good to us. If I don’t want to see a client, they are really supportive. They will always ask me, and even if I am rostered on and I can’t be fucked, they say it’s all fine for me to not come in. But I’ve heard other places can be quite different and people will have to pay a fine for being late sometimes. 

Why did you want to get into sex work?

For me, it’s just about the money. I do youth work as my full-time gig and it pays okay, but I would like to be making more so I thought this could be an easy way.

There’s a lot of stigma around sex work and a lot of assumptions that sex workers come from a suppressed background or they have gone through trauma - which is true for some people. But in my experience and with the people I have met in the industry it’s always been a choice people wanted to make.

I have two university degrees, it’s not like I don’t have options. It’s just a side hustle. 

I remember seeing a quote somewhere that said something like, if you are working outside labouring or if you are working a desk job, at the end of the day you are still selling your body. You are still selling your resources, your time, and your energy. Sex work is no different. 

Top image: Young man sitting on beach (mid section) - stock photo Source: Getty Images

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